How to mess up your National Team – according to the FA school of bad management.

What an interesting day for English football! Fabio Capello, the England manager who has been consistent only in his ability to disappoint, has resigned from his post just 4 months before a major tournament. Harry Redknapp, the much loved Spurs manager and heir apparent for the England job has been acquitted of tax fraud, reputation intact and immediately employable for the top job on the very same day. Kismet? Fate? Divine intervention? If Harry has any sense (and of course he has a great deal of nouse) he should be thankful for British justice, give even greater thanks for the amazing English Premier League but run a mile from the English Football Association.

The Capello tenure and the FA’s part in this has been a comedy of errors from start to finish.

Here is a quick guide on how to reduce a great footballing heritage to a shambles in a few easy steps:

1)   Appoint a manage who has excellent overseas club experience but doesn’t understand the culture of English football

2)   Don’t worry about the fact that the manager fails, even after 4 years, to master the language of a nation that is paying him around £4 million a year

3)   Despite mediocre performances by the team, re-negotiate his contract prior to the World Cup, even though you have the ideal opportunity to get stop the rot at the end of his contract.

4)   Witness a pitiful showing at the World Cup, precipitated by extremely bad man management by your chosen leader, including such poor judgment as failing to share the team selection with the players until the day of the match.

5)   Overlook the fact that on one occasion when the English team scored, your chosen manager sat motionless on the side line, arms crossed.

6)   Oversee a massive public humiliation during the World Cup bid process, involving the extreme lack of courtesy shown to the UK prime Minister and Prince William. Fail to implement damage limitation.

7)   Fail spectacularly in opposition of Sepp Blatter further weakening the voice of English football overseas.

8)   Finally, just when chosen manager stands  by his man (albeit the man that he unceremoniously sacked for infidelity and then reinstated when he realised that Terry probably was the best man for the job) – fail to support him and precipitate a resignation that would have been handy a couple of years ago.

I actually feel quite sorry for Fabio Capello. He was always the wrong man for the job, great credentials – yes, but wrong nationality, wrong personality and inadequate understanding of the English culture (and language).

I also feel sorry for the English team. They haven’t had a decent manager for over a decade.

But Harry – if I was you, don’t be seduced to take up the poisoned chalice. Wait for the FA to get their act together first.

FIFA get the President they deserve

It was announced today that Sepp Blatter, the incumbent President of the International Football Federation, will be re-elected unopposed for a fourth, four year term.

The original election was planned between two equally unsavoury candidates. The other one being Mohammed Bin Hammen who is now suspended whilst under investigation for bribery and corruption. (But I thought bribery and corruption was the mission statement for this organisation?)

Mmmm – Blatter vs Bin Hammen – a bit like choosing between Hannibal Lecter and The Pied Piper to babysit – either way it was going to end badly…

There was a faint glimmer of hope that the election fiasco would be halted when, in a remarkably convenient development just prior to the election, Blatter’s opponent was suspended. Step up the Brits – calling for a pause while another suitable candidate is found. Alas only 17 other associations had the guts to support this motion.

So FIFA get the President they deserve. The President who has presided over scandal after scandal and allegations of corruption, fraud and bribery. The President who has presided over football’s governing body as International football is at its lowest ebb. Dirty play on the field and even dirtier play behind the scenes. A refusal to embrace goal line technology and a warped approach in choosing the hosts for the World Cup. Even Jerome Valcke, the FIFA Secretary General has admitted that he believes that Qatar ‘bought’ the World Cup bid vote.

This is the President who pleads innocence in the same way that the family dog looks up at you with an ‘it wasn’t me’ expression as the Christmas dinner goes missing – despite turkey juices dripping out of his mouth!

Even if Mr Blatter was an innocent bystander with all these scandals – he remains culpable as the man in charge. A headmaster may be a veritable saint but if the pupils in his school display constant bad behaviour and the reputation of the organisation falls into disrepute, eventually the school’s governors will give him his marching orders. Standing by and looking the other way in some cases means you are just as culpable as the perpetrators.

Football has not grown in reputation one jot since Sepp Blatter and his cronies have been at the helm. And now those of us who are still struggling to love the beautiful game have been dealt yet another blow. If you don’t play fair in the boardroom how can you expect fair play on the pitch?

So what can be done? Not a lot. The only way to get rid of diseased tissue or an infestation is to either cut it out or treat it with strong chemicals. Alas, neither of those are feasible or legal.

How refreshing it would be to have an ‘anti-corruption candidate as President. To have a governing body that includes representation from the fans, players, sponsors and football management. In your dreams, wisebird, in your dreams.

So it’s business as usual. Sepp Blatter is apparently committed to cleaning up FIFA’s act. There is one other thing that will receive Sepp Blatter’s constant commitment and loyalty. Sepp Blatter.